First things first.

NO CANCER!!!!

I know, right? For 10 days I’ve been living in “What-If” World, awaiting results that, either way, will impact the rest of my life. I’ve already been impacted (and I’m not referring to the side effects of anesthesia and pain killers, but, yeah, that, too.) I am now dealing with constant pain and daily self-massage and exercises to prevent the dreaded lymphedema that often goes hand-in-hand with lymph node removal. 

The upside of this (the ONLY upside) is that this latest mess has been a big distraction from my elbow and all it’s hardware. I still have six-eight weeks until the nails get removed.

In a nutshell, after the disruptive dissection of all of the lymph nodes in my left armpit, I anxiously awaited a diagnosis. I was cautiously optimistic, yet prepared for bad news, since that is typically the only reason why all the nodes are removed. I’ve also been basically ghosted by the doctor, very unusual in Mexico, based on previous experiences. So at 9:00 pm last night, after literally begging the doctor to share the results (I knew they had been sent around mid-day), I got a brief, but acceptable response.

Negative for cancer.

The culprit? Wait for it…..

FAT!

Go figure. The only formidable fat on this body is tucked away in my fucking armpit, cleverly camouflaged as cancer.

AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!

As relieved as I am with the findings of the pathology report, I have an ax to grind and I’m angry. I’m left with so many unanswered questions. I feel violated and tossed aside. But I’ve decided, for the time being, to let go of the anger and take comfort in the fact that the ugly, terrible, horrible beast that is C is NOT invading my body! I can resume planning my future adventures. 

My stitches come out tomorrow. I hope that will be a step towards casting off the residual reminders of this latest lamentable experience. 

In the meantime…La Vida Continua su Camino  (Life continues its path)